I hate meditation. No, actually, that’s not true – I just hate the way it makes me feel. I don’t like paying $20+ for some smug muppet in top-to-toe Lululemon to tell me to “quiet my mind”. My mind likes a chat. It’s an over sharer and not a great listener – a bit like me.
Tell my mind to ‘be still’ and it’s guaranteed to go into overdrive. “Ooohhh, Bec there’s that thing you forgot to do. I wonder if blah blah has had the baby yet? You should check Facebook. What are you going to have for dinner? You ate three Tim Tams last night so you better eat something healthy. You’re crap at this meditating malarkey. What’s wrong with you?”
So yeah, meditation is not our friend. My mind and I don’t like meditation because it makes us feel inadequate.
On the other hand, I don’t like to feel like I’ve failed. So I thought I’d give it one last crack and signed up for The 21 Day Meditation Project. Mainly because it’s free, but also because it’s online (so no Lululemon), it’s guided (so someone else tells my mind what to do – she doesn’t listen to me), oh, and the longest meditation is 16 minutes, with most around the 10 minute mark. Even I can commit to that.
I’m on day 9 and meditation is starting to grow on my mind and me. In fact, if we don’t get our daily minutes of meditation, we really miss it. Maybe it’s the not-so-scary commitment of ten or so minutes a day for just 21 days; maybe it’s simply the ritual of having these daily moments to ourselves. But maybe meditation, just maybe, this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.
I love the honesty and bluntness. Guided (and short!) meditations are OK…me just sitting there and *being*…well not unless I'm sitting on the top of a mountain in India.
Hi Mirna – thanks for your comment. If only mountains in India were a little more accessible… I've had a comment from a fellow struggler that meditation made her cry (not in a good way!) and so she just sings in the car to Cher to 'clear her mind' instead – I say whatever floats your boat!